Finally Introducing

BOSTON ALEC GERBER

April 11, 2012

12:16 PM

8lbs 1oz

20 inches

*In loving memory of Alec Craig Crutcher*

Before we left for the hospital 37 weeks 2 days!

 Mommy's first glimpse at her new man all 8lbs 1 oz!

 The hugs are so sweet but look so painful to Boston!

 When Brynlee gets nervous she pokes

 Our gorgeous flowers from our church family!

 Let's head home

 First Dr. appt

So as my previous post said, the csection date was moved up by almost 2 weeks. And good thing! This "lil" man was 8lbs 1oz almost 3 weeks early, I cannot imagine what his size would have been if we waited! During the section Dr. Shepherd said it was a good thing we moved it up because my uterus was extremely thin from his size. Praise God for bringing back that pain or something very bad could have happened to one or both of us!

The delivery was fantastic, I was all about a repeat section and it went SO MUCH BETTER than Brynlee's birth. I remember everything and really got to soak up the last few hours with him in my belly. Once again, since it was a csection, a coworker got to be in the delivery. In this case, it was my preceptor when I started in NICU. She was A-MAZ-ING! She brought a crib card that NICU does special for all of our babies with Boston's name. She talked me through everything and gave us plenty of time together before she took him to the nursery. When I got to my room after recovery, I found out that he was having some difficulties breathing....instead of taking him to NICU they put him in "transition" which means he had 6 hours to recover or he would be taken to NICU. One of our Nurse Practitioners from NICU came up to talk to us about what was going on. I knew she would do everything in her power to keep him from going to NICU. I was of course in tears, not because I was afraid of NICU, but because I felt like I failed as his mother. At that moment I told myself I should have dealt with the pain to keep him in as long as possible even though I knew it was best for him to come out, I completely blamed myself. He was born at 12:16 and by 4 I was asking if I could get up to go see him. My nurse said no at first because I wasn't even 4 hours post op, but I had all of my feeling back and this was MY BABY! I was extremely upset, but my sister-in-law Rochelle came to the rescue! Her and her hubby, Ryan had just gotten there and I told her I wanted to see him. She said there is no reason I shouldn't be able to, so she talked the nurse into letting me get to a wheel chair to go see him! I am so lucky she works there....it really does pay to know people! :) I got to the wheel chair no problem and went down to the nursery. I stared through the window for at least an hour. I did feel bad because most of Andrew's family, my parents, and Brynlee were standing while I got to sit. No one complained and they gave me all the time I needed. About 6:30 I asked if he was going to get to stay or go to NICU. Well, they extended his transition for 2 more hours because he was still working hard to breathe. Again I say, it pays to know people because in any other case he would have gone to NICU. By 9:15 I was FINALLY cuddling my little man for the first time. It was so surreal, at that moment I had 2 children, both perfect in every way. Brynlee was exhausted and very grouchy...it was such a long day for her. She had a chance to hold him and then Andrew's parents took her home.  She came back to visit with my parents on Friday. She was 100% anti-mom. This COMPLETELY broke me. When they left I sobbed. I felt like I had totally ruined her life. She wouldn't sit by me, and barely talked to me. I was so crushed and so afraid of what the days to come would bring. I dreaded coming home because all I wanted was some lovin' from my little girl and I didn't think she would want anything to do with me. Andrew, Mom, and Trev reassured me that she would be fine and that she was just out of her element at the hospital. (let me tell you that that night my milk came in, I did the same thing with Brynlee, what a rush of hormones and emotions your milk supply does to you!) We got home Saturday and Trevin and Krystal brought her home after her first sleep over with them. The first thing she asked for when she came in was MOMMY! Oh I can't even tell you how much I needed that! She ran to me and gave me the biggest hug! Oh how I missed her! She was all about Boston that night and wanted to hold him and kiss him and calling him "my boson". I guess everyone was right, she was totally out of her element and I'm sure it was hard to see me in a hospital bed...she kept saying "mommy in bed, her tired". Boston had his first Dr. appt this morning because he had lost quite a bit of weight. He is currently down to 7lbs 1oz so I have to wake him up every 2 hours to eat....this is exhausting. I think I fell asleep between almost every feeding today. We are both doing great. The love that we have for him is so amazing. He is such a joy and ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE! :)

While I was in the hospital, they decided to do a cat scan to check out the abscess. It is smaller (YAY!) but still there. (one super annoying thing...I had to pump and dump for 48 hours...do you know how frustrating it is to pump for 30 minutes every 3 hours when you aren't getting anything?) Dr. Musial (infectious disease dr) came to talk to me about the CT and said I need to make a appt with a thoracic surgeon and Dr. Greely (the pulmonologist) said he just wanted to watch it for now. He said he has a conference at the end of the month and he wants to take me case there to get opinions from other doctors. I am going to call my family dr Tuesday and get her opinion. Crazy that these 2 doctors didn't collaborate before coming to talk to me when they have been discussing my case since December.

Anyways, I think that's all for now! We feel completely blessed! And are completely overjoyed with our new addition. We can't thank everyone enough who helped with Brynlee! We never had to worry because we knew she was in good hands and that was so comforting! We also want to thank everyone for all the prayers, love and encouragement this pregnancy. We have had an amazing support system with everything that's gone on! There still isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about the baby that we lost last May, but having Boston here helps me to see a little more of God's plan. He fits so perfectly into our family. Well, time to wake Boston for another feeding! Sorry for such a long post! :)
GOD IS SO GOOD! :)